How to Approach Gambling

And for you dirty minds, it'll stop you from trying to guess what I'm gon¬na say.
Gambling is looked upon by many people as an outlet from their everyday routine. And a lot more peo¬ple view it as a way to make that big killing.
Both theories are way, way out of line:

1.    If you get your jollys losing money at gambl¬ing, it's pretty obvious it don't take much to amuse you. Getting a hot foot from your playful 14 year old son must give you a bellyful of laughs.

2.    And you people who think gambling will eventually fill your pockets with gold, should have your clocks tuned into reality. You got a better chance digging for oilwells in your driveway.

I have a friend   Lotta Rhee  who swears that one day she will hit the lottery and retire to that dream house where the Buffalo roam and the skys are not cloudy all day.
Lotta's got a lot of problems if she thinks she has a great chance of being the millionaire recipient of a lot¬tery drawing. But then again, anyone who wants some big ugly buffalo meandering around their living room, has a strangle hold on illogical thinking in the first place. So I ain't gonna try and reach her with an intelligent outlook on gambling.

But maybe some of you will be touched by my words. Maybe you'll get some insight into how you should approach this very dangerous undertaking.
Painting is an art. Playing a musical instrument is an art. Dancing is an art. So is playing basketball or any sport. All of these things must be perfected, studied and mastered until they can be performed in such a way that they give you pleasure. Gambling is an art. Why should it be approached in any other manner than with an attempt to be perfect!

As we breeze through these chapters, I will show you the proper way to gamble   to hold your losses down.
So maybe you won't like my conservative ap¬proach. That's alright. My friend Lotta Rhee will save you a place in line to get your tickets for the Lottery. Since she has first crack at the buffalo species, maybe you can set your sights on a roomful of cantaloupes  or is it antelopes that like to play.

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Whatever, I just want to change your silly, ridiculous approach to gambling and show you a logical way to grind out some consistent returns.
Maybe you won't be shoveling big deposits into your bank account, but it beats shoveling up the deposits of a herd of antelopes and buffalo, but that's another story.